January 2009
i'm just so fucking....shot down
i really don’t know where my life is headed right now. 2009 is supposed to be my best year in twelve, and for the next twelve. yeah, RIGHT. so far this is what i know will happen:
in june, i will have no place to live. seriously.
i will probably not be abelt to afford to go to FIDM, as much as i desperately want to.
i might not even be able to go to city college right away, because i will...
“you’ve got your pleasures all around you, put them all in a row.”
– jason scwartzman, a la coconut records.
i should be doing my film lit journals
but they have wifi at this cafe, soooo, yeah.
they’re not due until wednesday, anway. so i’ll do a couple tonight maybe and then i’ll work on them during 1st&2nd period for the next couple days. i also need to finish my nOATs for Cool Hand Luke.
I started to fill out my FAFSA. the only thing i didnt know for sure was my mom’s social security number. also don’t...
horrible..
unreal31337:
radicalruby:
unreal31337:
radicalruby:
conversation that took place last night while Dominick was sleeping. I literally felt like crying afterward.
D: /weird moaning noise/
R: what’s wrong?
D: its just..scare-….staring /breathing quickens/
R: shh, shh, it’s ok. i’m here
D: i don’t want it to get you too!!
R: don’t worry, there’s nothing there, it’s ok
D: /weird...
I had a great flying dream. And right before i fell asleep, a new tattoo idea that i LOVE. will elaborate later.
horrible..
unreal31337:
radicalruby:
conversation that took place last night while Dominick was sleeping. I literally felt like crying afterward.
D: /weird moaning noise/
R: what’s wrong?
D: its just..scare-….staring /breathing quickens/
R: shh, shh, it’s ok. i’m here
D: i don’t want it to get you too!!
R: don’t worry, there’s nothing there, it’s ok
D: /weird whimpers, breathing irregular/
R:...
horrible..
conversation that took place last night while Dominick was sleeping. I literally felt like crying afterward.
D: /weird moaning noise/
R: what’s wrong?
D: its just..scare-….staring /breathing quickens/
R: shh, shh, it’s ok. i’m here
D: i don’t want it to get you too!!
R: don’t worry, there’s nothing there, it’s ok
D: /weird whimpers, breathing...
i hate when people spoil movies for me
it really sucks. they just start talking like im not even in the room, dont even bother to figure out whether or not ive seen it or want to. ugh. in.con.siderate.
i have so many things i need to buy. i definitely need a bus pass for february—it sucked to not have one for january. i need to buy my fall out boy ticket, and i need to get the money to miranda asap. i need to buy texts and/or...
in math
unreal31337:
radicalruby:
tired. reading. saw gran torino. bad comparison to jesus. tired.
Would you reccommend seeing it?
NO. IT WAS a piece of shit. there were some parts that were so bad they were funny, though.
i think i'm too sexually inclined
i guess i am a teenager, afterall. but still. i need to focus on other stuff. i think it’s just that i’m no good at balance.
i want to go to FIDM. it’s starting to be this ideal future thing, now, where like, i’ll be this cool sf chick sharing an apartment with three or four other people, studying interior design and making hip new friends with common creative goals.
the...
in math
tired. reading. saw gran torino. bad comparison to jesus. tired.
Going to bed. Damn yov for keeping me up, Neopets! Damn you!!
pre written tumbl
My internet isn’t working. Well, the wireless can’t be found. And Christine is downloading some movies or something so she has the internet cord, and i don’t wanna take it from her. but it seems like I’m the only one not getting internet ): But, because of the fact that i had no internet connection (as well as, I’m sure, the fact that I made coffee), I was very productive. First I did my laundry,...
Coconut Records, the solo project of Jason... →
we got hit
somone in the wrong lane. hit us head on. drove away. they cant arrest him for it because of stupid legal bullshit.
i need a really good neck massage.
my neck has been hurting for ages, and right now it’s giving me a major headache.
so, i was right, i did have an infection. got the anitbiotics and the “green card” after fillin gout waay too many forms, my head has been hurting for hours. i ate, drank, rested. nothing helping. but i fucking HAVE to go to school tomorrow. i can NOT fuck up my last semester of high school,...
you know what i hate about jealousy?
it’s that I KNOW that it’s unfounded. I KNOW that he would tell me and I KNOW that there’s no chance anyway. but i just can’t fucking fight it. i can’t get rid of the dirtiness that it makes me feel when i’m by myself and they’re together. it’s just not fair. especially when we’re on such..weird ground right now. the little time i do get is...
theatre
i cut my hair some more. bangs are a little too short but they’ll grow back soon.
i’m really really hungry, but i’m not sure why it’s SO bad. i ate jack in the box last night around 5 and then christine made me a breakfast burrito aroudn 11 when she got back from work. maybe it’s because i’ve been chewing gum.
so, friday was my appointment and then i hung out...
my appointment:
my doctor was great. she really treated me like an equal, and she was friendly, super helpful.
i asked all the questions that i had, she answered them quickly, got me a three month’s supply, the back ups, and the Plan B, which i found hilarious. I LOVE the name of that product. just fucking hilarious. “because plan a of pulling out and coming on her face didn’t work out.”
i have to go to the doctor
blah. i wanted a physical but i had one under a year ago so i can’t. so my mom told them my knee still hurts, which it doesnt. i think i’ll ask about…b.c. ;)
so fucking hard
every lean in i want to cry every poke i want to keep the hand every pat i want to stay there forver
i want to cry
List of things that are Myths
unreal31337:
Feel free to reblog to add more
Bisexuals
Unicorns
Equal Rights
Third Party Victories
screw you, oliver! i’m bi!
i like chocolate almond milk
and i hate my life.
yesterday was bad until the night time, and today has been about 3 million times worse. it’s all my fault. i dont deserve compassion or comforting. i feel worthless. i am worthless. it’s all my fault.
but it’s not over. well, for now it is, but not forever. he said he knows that.
christine is bringing me a cheddar and avocado burger when she gets off work....
there’s something wrong with me. Everything is making me cry today, and it really fucking hurts. Physically and emotionally.
I is can no go sleeeeeeeep!!!!!!!
just finally finished the dishes
i’m really full, but i keep fucking eating.
i’m totally with you on the vans thing, cynthie. i will most definitely (probably) be buying a pair tomorrow.
i think i’m gonna not see wicked. i can’t decide. cause i wanna spend the money on other stuff, and i dunno if i’ll enjoy it all that much if not many people come.
it’s really fucking hot here. i had a yummy...
just felt like closing the internet, so i’m using my tumblet. i went to the eggettes in south city for the first time today. tried coconut, didn’t like it much.
sleepy.
i like W.A.T.A.
i’m feeling this. i ammmmm.
borrowed line, thx postal service&hannah combs(aka...
i already am immune to the morning breath and like i said, the freckles in our eyes are mirror images and when we kiss you’re double but the creases in our lips, they’re perfectly aligned i’m broken and shattered and lying and dieing but not good enough just a girl but be sure to embrace me before i stop believing in love
so i'm really irritated
i just really don’t feel like i’m at all being included in the drama club anymore, and it really hurts. we don’t even HAVE council meetings anymore, and i feel like i’m the only senior not included in the discussions now, just because i’m not super close with amanda or camille. jan doesn’t tell me anything. miko knows more shit than i do. i hate it. it’s...
sadly, cynderella, i go to krispy kreme quite a...
and i’m fairly certain that they don’t have the new york cheesecale doughnut at the one near our houses. unless they just started it today.
depressing, i know.
gluttonyisabliss
imcynthie: my heart starts racing when i look at the chocolatey stuff
CrackBabyRuby: omg
CrackBabyRuby: its TOTALLY like food porn
imcynthie: LOLOLOLOLOLOL
CrackBabyRuby: makes ya wet, but in yer mouth (;
my new years eve:
was kinda awesome. first i went out to sushi with dominick, havent had sushi in foreverrr, so, yum.
came back right as dinner was about to be served, ate again, like the fatass i am. homemade quiche (eggballs with other stuff in it), tiny little roll thingies of yumminess, a great salad, and seafood pasta (gluten-free rice-based pasta). sparkling pomegranate juice.
we finished eating, and...